


Untitled

by our_black_heart



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: M/M, after the breakup, post breakup
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-17
Updated: 2014-11-17
Packaged: 2018-02-25 18:02:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2631080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/our_black_heart/pseuds/our_black_heart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Frank and Gerard "run in" to each other in New York, a year after the breakup.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Untitled

**Author's Note:**

> I have no idea what this is or where this came from. I also have not edited it, but I will, so please excuse mistakes.

Frank’s eyes had grown tragic in recent times. They’d grown old and sad, they were almost as bleak as they were hazel and even then, they weren’t a golden hazel anymore. When Gerard saw Frank for the first time in a year, it was odd and awkward. They were both in New York for the night, Gerard had just flown in from LA and they were both performing cross town in the same town. They had no intention of meeting up with one another, really it wasn’t planned. Gerard had long since decided that he wouldn’t see Frank, even in New York he wouldn’t see Frank. Even in New York on the same night, he wouldn’t see Frank. He wouldn’t try to see Frank. He had avoided the fact all day, he had gone about his business. Stopped by some of his favorite coffee houses, gone to some of his favorite comic shops, but the last place he’d expected to see Frank was outside of the venue after he had signed as many autographs as possible. Gerard was sweaty and still had a sort of lingering anxious buzzing from the show, he was bouncing on his heels and his hands were a little chilly. He had gotten into the rhythm of rubbing his hands together in order to keep them warm, in Cali it was nowhere near this cold. It was actually kind of warm enough to make him sweat every time he left the house in a suit. Which was often. But he was outside, it was a little chilly so he was alternating between rubbing his hands together and holding his jacket closer to himself. He had just finished signing all of the things fans wanted him to sign. He was exhausted, no doubt, but he was alone now and he was just itching to have one. Just one. No one would know except the bus driver and him, the rest of the band was already tucked in surely enough. Hidden in their bunks, cuddled up in blankets. They weren’t lively enough for Gerard, he was a night person. He always had been, especially after shows when the adrenaline was just too real to pretend was gone, too active in his system to ignore. He had to calm the beast with a little nicotine and he wasn’t supposed too, but who was going to stop him? The bus driver? No, of course not. He was just going to toss him a couple shady looks and a few loose head shakes, but even his judgmental actions couldn’t scratch the itch that was howling deep within the cavity of his chest. That howling was subdued, in fact it had silenced completely when Frank came around the corner a cheeky fucking grin on his face. Like fucking always. It was just as he had remembered, the same wide spread, lively smile. He’d almost swallowed his tongue, he didn’t have time to process before Frank was pulling him into a hug. The man was small framed, that hadn’t changed, but he hugged like no one’s business and that also didn’t change. It wasn’t until they pulled apart, that Gerard had seen the vacancy in Frank’s eyes. It hit him like a ton of bricks. The overwhelming whirlwind of feelings was almost too much, borderline even. But not exactly, not fully. Frank was lost, he was a lost man following around lost causes, Gerard was sure of that now. It takes a lost cause to know a lost cause and it takes a lost cause to follow one around. And here they both were. One hollow man to another, eyes soaring across bodies, across faces, empty eyes examining empty eyes. Realization hit fast and hard, they both took in sharp, harsh breaths at the same time. Gerard looks at Frank again and he laughs. Frank starts to giggle that stupid giggle of his and he picks a cigarette out of the pack in Gerard’s pocket. 

“I’m not even supposed to be smoking anymore.” Frank sighs. He inhales the tobacco and all feels momentarily right with the world. All feels like maybe the cosmos will align tonight and everything that is supposed to happen will, then the world will be as it is intended to be and he will never face an unhappy day again. He knows that’s not true, but who is he to deny the happy sads that are fluttering in his chest and telling him to open up those sparkly hopeful eyes again. 

Gerard sees the shift in them like a meteor. It makes him almost as happy as Frank looks hopeful. 

“I quit a while ago.” Gerard says between puffs. Frank scoffs.

“Yeah okay, cause you’re not sucking on a cigarette right now.” 

“I am, but I quit a long time ago.” Frank just nods his head, because if he knows Gerard, which he does then he knows that Gerard has some weird fucked up explanation that actually makes sense somewhere down the line. The man’s head is a deep, deep cavern of ingenuity. He can create any explanation for anything and he can make it sound totally valid. The man has method to his madness, that is apparent. But he also knows that if Gerard starts to explain something he will talk his ear off and he’s not totally sure that he wants to talk to Gerard just yet. 

Gerard looks at Frank again and he looks noticeably more relaxed. Maybe the cigarette did some sort of black magic on him and maybe now he will be more receptive to the apology Gerard’s been reciting in front of the mirror for over a year now, just in case something like this would happen. You never really know with Frank, he could be pissed for days, weeks on end and not say a single word to you. But he’s also the type of person who will forgive you within the hour and walk over to you and give you the sweetest kiss that you will never forget. Those kind of Frank kisses linger for days, stuck at the forefront of your mind and you’ll find yourself in your bunk in the middle of the night with your lips still puckered and your mind wondering back to all the semi decent things you did in your life and how they could have led up to you deserving a kiss like the one you’d recently shared, because holy shit that was a sweet ass kiss. Frank was as unpredictable as it got for Gerard, because Gerard tries really hard to keep structure in his life. Even during chaos, Gerard wants some sort of structure. Not Frank though, he delves in the chaos. He is successful during chaos, he is courageous during chaos, he is chaos. 

“You’re not ready to talk, are you?” Frank looks over at Gerard and he just smirks again. The question is fresh out of Gerard’s mouth and he can still taste the words on the very tip of his tongue, he can almost regret them, but he can’t really do anything about them at this point. Frank takes another puff of his cigarette, he maintains as much eye contact with Gerard as he physically can take without blinking, but then he does and he looks down at his feet to kick some trash off of the sidewalk. Gerard doesn’t take his eyes off of Frank, because it’s too late now and he’s brought it up, he needs to know. 

“No, ha. This is good enough for now. This is all I want. This small talk and this silence. I like it like this for now.” He’s still got that stupid smile on his face and Gerard has no option, but to nod at his response. He owes him that much anyway. He can totally give him some time. Plus Frank was doing that thing where he talks with his hands and his voice sounds like it is about to break at any moment. Gerard totally gets that it’s a delicate, emotional subject. He won’t bring it up again. 

“So, how was the show? Did they love you? They always love you, Frankie.” Frank nods excitedly all while shoving his hands into his pockets. He makes himself look smaller when he’s excited. 

“They did, I don’t know why they did, but they did. And they do! I don’t know why they do, but they do!” 

“You were made to perform, Frank. It’s just what you’re meant to do. You belong up there.” 

“I guess I do, huh?” He shrugs, because Frank is a modest motherfucker and compliments make his cheeks turn pink and his voice gets just slightly deeper than it is. 

They stare at each other again, it almost feels as if they are waiting to board the bus together. As if they’d just finished up a show together and the crowd was fucking great. 

“Yeah, you do.” They both smile. A soft smile, not as intense as the ones they’ve been sharing throughout the short conversation, but more important than the previous ones. 

“Hey! Gerard, we gotta go if we want to make it to the next venue on time!” The bus driver shouts and Gerard’s shoulders noticeably drop. He shoots the bus driver a thumbs up and a wink and the guy rolls his eyes cause that usually means “give me like ten more minutes”. 

“I uh, gotta go. This was nice.” He says as he gestures between Frank and himself. They’re both smiling and behind his words there is a genuine tone, an important tone that means that the visit was surprisingly pleasant and he might want to see Frank more often or again.

“Yeah, it was. Thanks for the smoke.” Frank says as he leans in to hug Gerard yet again, that long kind of hug that will keep Gerard warm for a while. Frank looks up at him with those huge pleading eyes and he doesn’t even know what he’s pleading for and Gerard sort of gets the feeling that Frank doesn’t even consciously know he’s got those pleading eyes on. But Gerard also notices that they’re still bleak, they’re so fucking bleak and inky and they probably won’t ever be as alive as they once were. And he can only really blame himself for that. Maybe one day after they really talk, Frank’s eyes won’t be as empty anymore. He really hopes that day will come. 

Then Frank kisses him.

And it’s not one of those “I forgive you” kisses, it’s one of those “till next time” kisses. And those were even worse than the aforementioned kisses. This was the type of kiss that kept Gerard up at night for totally different reasons. This was the type of kiss that gave Gerard stomachaches in the early mornings. The kind of kiss that kept him feeling homesick and made him think of all his sins, made him think of ways to repent. It’s fucking Frank. That’s what he does to people. He was the magick boy with the tragic eyes that Gerard hadn’t expected. He was always the boy that Gerard was never ready for.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading my random bs. Hope you like it.


End file.
